Scr...Wri... ing!

Screeee...No ...Scriii...Ohho...Scribb. Dammit ! Scribble Yes , Got it !...scribble...

Wriy-- writ--Ghosh! Write !Phew!!

Never thought coming back to writing would be so hard! Finally I'm expressing myself in form of words rather than just stretching my lips wide apart in the form of a concealing yet revealing smile!

Heart is filled to the brim

Brain is absolutely numb

No, am not cribbing, crying or craving

I long to revisit my childhood

Give a warm hug to that innocence

and Indulge in life's real and unreal pleasures

*Does there really come a time in our life when we start deteriorating with respect to personality & the quality of life that we wished or planned for.

* Why does our life seem to have caught up in the cobwebs of nothingness?

* Why do I see an abyss inside me?

My brother's recent Job stint in a space science based company flooded my mind with long dead dreams and desires of being a Space Scientist. I realized my heart still skips a beat at the mere mention of the word space/constellation/cosmos and no wonder i even started my SOP's opening line with cosmos of cell biology :P. Sometimes I wonder if the events in our life are interrelated. Just few days back my high-school teacher sent me a request on facebook. I can still vividly remember that Physics period, one whole hour filled with discussion over the fundamentals of physics & space science and how I would just not let go of it. In retrospect , she was such a wonderful teacher to have not discouraged my budding desire. My classmates were rejoicing over the fact that an entire period was sacrificed to fulfill my curiosity :P.

And then comes my brother's job. Wonder how these two events brought a gush of memories which swept me away so much so that I came back to my dear blog.

And its been not late enough when I heard a news stating discoveries towards diamonds in outer space. Wish I had taken all those ideas & dreams more close to fulfillment rather than writing heartlessly for my forlorn Love!

My dad always motivated me to write down my ideas the moment they came in and I really am thankful for instilling in me that desire every now and then. if only I had stuck to it! But then as it goes...It's never too late ...

hence, I'm here, revisiting my childhood, my innocence, my dreamy eyes ... ready to tread a new path unhindered! :)

Abstract Artwork

Cosmic Cognition

Pancha Tattva

Human-Plant Confluence

Something :P

5 things Paliwal hates about me :P as a part of our conversation on skype:

S: no 1 hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

S: 2 silence

S: 3 hmm

S: 4 kheeeee for everything

S: 5 casual chalta hai

had nothing interesting to put up; so, yes wrote this

& yes a Random thought : " Is it justified that the sense and sensitivities of life give birth to insanity & insensitivities ? "

& for Mr. Anonymous: Yes, i don't take you as a person ! Nameless, faceless, writing beings don't exist according to a rational mind !

hmm...

I guess i found a correlation !!

& yes thanks to a chat with someone ..I came up with this impromptu definition of Hmm...

hmm means thinking ....

it means absence of words....

it means giving weight to silence ....

it means saying something while keeping your opinion veiled...

its a way to smile softly....

its called hmming !

Disillusioned one speaks...

*
Strange how one can live an entire lifetime in illusion. Illusion of belief. Illusion of self. Illusion of relationships. Illusion of the entire existence.
And yet when the mist of illusion gives way to the dazzling light of reality we are too dazed to believe that sunshine has shone upon us. The hangover then leads to shocking revelation unacceptable by the disillusioned psyche.

*
If emotions are like colors then Relationships are like paintings where we fill right colors at the right place and get a masterpiece !

*
to be cont...

story so far...

{ whosoever reads this : don't even dare to ask why i have written this ....or condemn it by saying it doesn rhyme well ; i just had to write something after painfully long time ...so take it as it is }

i try to stay calm
i try to stay happy
nothing satisfies my sorrow
nothing saves my soul

i laugh ....& i laugh until there's no scope to cry

i cry ....& cry & still i cry

happiness is lapidated
prosperity is dilapidated
life is unsuited
love is uncomprehended
& i ?
i am thankfully disenchanted

i hate this brain
this brain that becomes a curse
i hate being my own enemy

hope i am dead & ready to be born
face this world head strong

a chuckle ... a cackle ...& a tear to end it all ...

THE therapeutic tag !

Firstly my apologies for giving my response so late ( god !! am damn sure next time , if at all ( whose chances are negligible to nill ) anybody tags me ; the person will leave a gap of century before he comes next to view the results :P )

The prime reason why i was avoiding this was my ingrained , mostly unreasonable inhibitions.But then let me just start ....

[ Statutory Notice : This article has been written under the influence of present state of mind
( considering it a radical entity) . Kindly reserve your snickering , disbelief or just plain amusement for the forthcoming write up :) ]

10 things i miss in my life right now :

1.i miss my sensibility
2. i miss my school so so very much
3. i miss those carefree days of childhood
4.the morning assemblies & yes not to forget the bloopers associated with them (:p)
5.i miss going to painting competitions : it was the best part of my life
6.i miss mom's constant nagging for everything wrong with me
7.i miss my brother's innocence ( how i wish he never grew up!.. )
8.those clothes that don't fit me anymore :(... ( when will i stop gaining weight :p )
9.miss " healthy" screen of my cell phone ...( people who've seen it know what I'm talking about )
10. & yes how could i forget this , i miss studies so very much ever since i came to USBT :p [ gaurav sir will get what i mean :) ]

10 things i want to achieve within a decade :

1. Step into the design industry ( how ? let the time tell :) ... )
2. Know how to drive a car safely on Delhi roads & yes own any of the Volkswagen model
3. Wear a kimono , traditional way & make Japanese green tea
4. learn to cook decent edible food for humans :p
5. Make sense of what to do with Biotechnology degree in hand
6. walk in the waters of corals
7. swim in the river full of piranhas ( first i'll have to learn swimming for that )
8. go on a pilgrimage called " world tour " ( will try me best to see everything that i did on discovery channel , i have started making my list already :)... )
9. For once try my hand at glassware shaping in a Finnish glassware factory & dolphin training in Bahamas .
10. & yes what's there in writing ..." A memorable date with Richard Gere :p "

now who do i tag ...lemme see ... nikhil , anu , ranjhani &... subbu ji ap bhi likh do to acha hoga :)

i feel elated to open my account for this year finally ( a post for the year 2008 :) )
hope u don't take that much time as i did ...happy blogging people !